Boring Stories × Jessie

Ford-first. Your queue.

Two Ford rooftops this week. You are the "I." Hello, the hole, the $10,308, what you looked up, then we do not build them a new site. Send five a day, BCC me.

Jessie JuarezAugust 22, 2026Jason

0 of 6 done

01
Read the two send letters

They are the packet. Tor, then Paul. Dave is labeled do not send. Hello first. Then the hole. Then the search number. Then what you looked up. We do not mash a new website into these. Ninety days is the trial.
02
Get sending working

Cold mail leaves from boringstoriescreative.com, not boringstories.io. If you do not have send-as on that domain yet, tell me and I will add it. Cap is five a day. BCC jason@boringstories.io on every one. Footer stays on every one. If someone says stop, tell me the same day.
03
Send Tor, then Paul

In that order. Tor is the owner in Norco. Paul ran internet at Raceway before he ran the store. Do not send Dave. Do not add a third name until these two are out.
This week
04
After you send, log it

Date, who, which email. I will show you the row in outreach-master. Until Boring OS has the deals, that sheet is the queue.
05
Thursday

Friday is out. If Thursday works, say so. If it doesn't, pick another hour next week. I will come to you.
06
When one of them says yes

Do not quote lease-to-own. Do not say we never mark up the buy. You already have the Ford footage. Pull it once we have a signed rooftop, not before.

The letters

Two to send. One on hold. Copy, paste, send. Footer is already on them. From address is jason@boringstoriescreative.com until your send-as is live. Then swap the name, keep the domain.

01 · Send · Hemborg Ford · Norco

Tor Hemborg, owner

torhemborg@hemborgford.com · subject: family owned, footer badge

Tor, Hello, I'm Jessie Juarez. I'm with Boring Stories. We're in the business of making businesses more money. If someone in Norco asks Google or ChatGPT who the family Ford store is, they get a footer badge. Family owned since 1983. The About page is hours, a map, and "your new Ford dealership." No founder. No picture of the family. The average store spends $10,308 a month on search. That's NADA 2025. That line is supposed to get a Norco buyer to this lot. I looked at how you show up in search and in the answers ChatGPT gives. Fritts Ford in Riverside has a headline on the homepage. You have a badge. We don't need to build you a new website. Point the search at this rooftop and make the page you already have findable. Ninety days to start. That's the trial. Want what I found? Jessie Juarez Boring Stories 1207 E Almond Ave, Orange, CA 92866 This is an advertisement for my services. If you'd rather I didn't write again, say so and I won't.

02 · Send · Raceway Ford · Riverside

Paul Cole, GM

paul@racewayford.com · subject: racewayford.com, blocked

Paul, Hello, I'm Jessie Juarez. I'm with Boring Stories. We're in the business of making businesses more money. If a crawler tries to open racewayford.com, it gets blocked. You ran the internet desk at Raceway before you ran the store. That wall is what they see instead of the Ford store you've had since 1988. The average store spends $10,308 a month on search. That's NADA 2025. I looked at how you show up in search and in the answers ChatGPT gives. Fritts, same city, the site loads. We don't need a new website. Unblock the front door and point the search at this lot. Ninety days to start. That's the trial. Want what I found? Jessie Juarez Boring Stories 1207 E Almond Ave, Orange, CA 92866 This is an advertisement for my services. If you'd rather I didn't write again, say so and I won't.

Hold · Theodore Robins Ford · Costa Mesa

Dave Robins, owner / GM

daverobins@robinsford.com · subject: Harbor Blvd Ford, inventory page

Do not send · suppression

Do not send. Daniel already touched this rooftop. Suppression first.

Dave, Hello, I'm Jessie Juarez. I'm with Boring Stories. We're in the business of making businesses more money. If someone in Costa Mesa asks Google or ChatGPT who to buy a Ford from on Harbor, they land on an inventory page. No headline. Four generations since 1921 are on /history/. The homepage title still has DealerRater glued to it. The average store spends $10,308 a month on search. That's NADA 2025. We don't need a new website. Point the search at Harbor and make the page you already have findable. Ninety days to start. That's the trial. Want what I found? Jessie Juarez Boring Stories 1207 E Almond Ave, Orange, CA 92866 This is an advertisement for my services. If you'd rather I didn't write again, say so and I won't.

How we write these

Wedge for that store. Not a video letter. Not a website letter.

You are the "I." Hello, then who we are, then the hole, then the $10,308 search number, then what you looked up, then the gap, then we do not build them a new site.

The number: NADA 2025, $10,308 a month on search, the average store. Never "you spend." Never a second figure.

The help: search targeting, make the page they already have findable. Ninety days is the trial. Do not promise they will rank best. We do not have that guarantee.

Do not mention ExtraVision. Do not mention a portal. Do not say we never mark up the buy. Do not offer lease-to-own. Do not mash the website $5k into this letter. Do not put a price in the letter. No "rank best."

Thursday's hang, checkable: action items.

JasonBoring Stories